Chinese Customs
Submitted by Anonymous on Mon, 09/01/2014 - 14:23
A Chinese moves to USA after 50 years of living in Shanghai.
He bought a home on a small piece of land. The friendly American neighbour decides to go across and welcome the new guy. He goes next door but on his way up the drive-way he sees the Chinese man running around his front yard chasing about 10 hens.
Not wanting to interrupt these 'Chinese customs', he decides to put the welcome on hold for the day.
Next day, he decides to try again, but just as he is about to knock on the front door, he looks through the window and sees the Chinese urinate into a glass and then drink it. Not wanting to interrupt another 'Chinese custom', he decides to put the welcome on hold for yet another day.
A day later, he decides to give it one last go, but on his way next door, he sees the China-man leading a bull down the drive-way, pause and then put his left ear next to the bull's butt.
The American bloke can't handle this, so he goes up to the China-man and says, "Jeez buddy, what the hell is it with your Chinese customs? I come over to welcome you to the neighbourhood and see you running around the yard after hens. The next day you are pissing in a glass and drinking it, and then today you have your head so close to that bull's butt, it could just about shit on you."
The China man is very taken back and says, "Sorry sir, you no understand, these no Chinese customs I doing, these American Customs."
''What do you mean?'' says the neighbour, ''Those aren't American customs.''
"Yes they are, man at travel agent tell me'' replied the China-man ''He say to become true American, I must learn to; chase chicks, get piss drunk and listen to bull-shit!"
He bought a home on a small piece of land. The friendly American neighbour decides to go across and welcome the new guy. He goes next door but on his way up the drive-way he sees the Chinese man running around his front yard chasing about 10 hens.
Not wanting to interrupt these 'Chinese customs', he decides to put the welcome on hold for the day.
Next day, he decides to try again, but just as he is about to knock on the front door, he looks through the window and sees the Chinese urinate into a glass and then drink it. Not wanting to interrupt another 'Chinese custom', he decides to put the welcome on hold for yet another day.
A day later, he decides to give it one last go, but on his way next door, he sees the China-man leading a bull down the drive-way, pause and then put his left ear next to the bull's butt.
The American bloke can't handle this, so he goes up to the China-man and says, "Jeez buddy, what the hell is it with your Chinese customs? I come over to welcome you to the neighbourhood and see you running around the yard after hens. The next day you are pissing in a glass and drinking it, and then today you have your head so close to that bull's butt, it could just about shit on you."
The China man is very taken back and says, "Sorry sir, you no understand, these no Chinese customs I doing, these American Customs."
''What do you mean?'' says the neighbour, ''Those aren't American customs.''
"Yes they are, man at travel agent tell me'' replied the China-man ''He say to become true American, I must learn to; chase chicks, get piss drunk and listen to bull-shit!"
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