Marriage Jokes

WIFE: Honey before we got married, you used to give me gifts and expensive jewelry.HUSBAND: Yes, and?WIFE: How come you don't do it anymore?HUSBAND: Have you ever seen a fisherman...

You stop and pick up a nice hitch-hiking girl. Suddenly she loses consciousness and you take her to a hospital. This is STRESS! In the hospital you are being told that she is...

A drunk 18 year old boy asked a married woman out. The woman got so pissed she went to tell her husband about the encounter.The husband told the woman to invite the boy over so...

MAN: I'm so sorry dear, we can't get married because my family members are seriously against it.WOMAN: What do you mean!? Who are those against our marriage?MAN: My three wives...

A couple agreed that whenever they wanted to have sex they'd say "Let's make a phone call"One day the man sent his son to tell his mom while she was busy in the kitchen.SON: Mom,...

Every night, after dinner, a man took off for a bar. He spent the whole evening there, and arrived home very drunk around midnight each night. His wife, waiting up for him, would...

A man arrives home from a business trip to find the dining table set for two people, with candles flickering romantically and a bottle of champagne on ice. He walks into the...

One spelling mistake can destroy a marriage!A husband wrote a message to his wife on his official trip and forgot to add 'e' at the end of a word,"I am having such a wonderful...

A man and his wife shower together. The husband puts his hand on her breast and says "These are nice but if they were a bit firmer, you could walk around without a bra for me."...

Susan is fed up with her husband watching football on TV all the time."Im leaving you!" she yells. "All you care about is football. In any case, Ive found someone else. Hes much...

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