18+ Jokes

A child goes home and says to his mother, "Mom, I had sex with my teacher." The mum, angry, replies, "How could you?! Go up to your room and wait for your father!" A few hours...

Last week I checked into my hotel and was a bit lonely. I thought I'd call one of those girls you see advertised in phone books like escorts and such. I picked up the phone book...

The queen of England was visiting one of America's top hospitals, and during her tour she passed a room where a male patient was masturbating.''Oh my god!'', said the Queen, ''...

One weekend, the husband is in the bathroom shaving when the kid he hired to mow his lawn, a local kid named Bubba, comes in to pee. The husband slyly looks over and is shocked...

A successful businessman flew to Vegas for the weekend to gamble. He lost the shirt off his back, and had nothing left but a coin and the second half of his round-trip ticket. If...

In the morning, Kwame calls to his boss, "Good morning, boss, unfortunately I'm not coming to work today. I'm really sick. I got a headache, stomach ache, and both my hands and...

A little boy gets up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. As he passes his parent's bedroom he peeks in through the keyhole.He watches for a moment, then continues on...

Husband to wife: "Darling, I have to confess to you that when Im having sex with you, I sometimes think about other women."WIFE: "I have a confession to make too sweetheart. When...

Three girls died and were brought to the gates of heaven. Upon entering the gate, they were halted by St. Peter and his obedient angel. St. Peter asked the girls, "Before entering...

A guy walking down the street sees a woman with perfect breasts. He says to her, Hey miss, would you let me bite your breasts for $100 dollars?Are you nuts?! she replies and keeps...