How Heaven Looks Like

James and Tunde are business partners. They make a deal that whichever one dies first will contact the living one from the afterlife. So Tunde dies. James doesn't hear
from him for about a year, figures there is no afterlife. Then one day he gets a call. It's Tunde, "So there is an afterlife!"

"What's it like?" James asks.

"Well, I sleep very late. I get up, have a big breakfast. Then I have sex, lots of sex. Then I go back to sleep, but I get up for lunch, have a big lunch. Have some more sex, take a nap. Huge dinner. More sex. Go to sleep and wake up the next day.

"Oh, my God," says James. "So that's what heaven is like?"

"Oh no," says James. "I'm not in heaven. I'm a pig in someone's pen farm."