At The Bar

The couple had been married for only two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, can't wait to go out in town and party with his old buddies.

"Honey," he said to his new bride, "I'll be right back..."

"Where are you going baby?" asks the wife.

"I'm going to the bar pretty face. I'm going to have a beer."

"You want a beer, my Love?" She opens the refrigerator door shows him 25 different brands of beer from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, including six places he's never even heard of.

The husband is confused, and all he can think to say is, "Yes, honey pie, but the bar you know... the frozen glass..."

He hasn't finished the sentence before wifey interrupts him by saying, "You want a frozen glass?" She hands him a mug out of the freezer that is so cold that it freezes his fingers."

Yes this is good love," He says a bit desperately, "but at the bar, they have those meat chops that are really delicious... I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"

"What! You want meat chops, my love?" She opens the oven and removes 15 different roasted meat varieties: chicken wings, roasted goat meat, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.

"But honey pie... I know that you have made a big effort to make this, but at the bar it is different, I just miss all the... you know... the swearing, the dirty words and all that..."

"You want dirty words, cutie pie? Here... DRINK YOUR F**KING BEER IN YOUR FROZEN F**KING MUG AND EAT YOUR F**KING MEAT CHOPS, BECAUSE YOU AREN'T GOING ANYWHERE! GOT IT, ASSHOLE?!"