18+ Jokes

You pick me up, you remove my cloth and suck me. You suck me and suck me, you suck my juice until it's dry and throw me away like a piece of rubbish... Stop thinking so far and...

A man walked into a supermarket with his zipper down. A lady walked up to him and said, "Your barracks door is open." He did not understand her, so he went on his way looking...

A Mortuary Attendant was receiving bodies .When he saw this body with the name Mike on it with the longest d*ck he has ever seen.He decided to cut it off and go show his wife.When...

A man wanted to buy a cow, so he holds the cow's udders (breasts) and at the same time caresses them. His son asks, "Dad why are you doing that to the cow?"The man replied, "Son,...

A blind man walks into a restaurant and sits down. The waiter, who is also the owner, walks up to the blind man and hands him a menu. "I'm sorry, sir, but I am blind and can't...

There were three women who were at the gynecologist having pre-natal checkups The doctor asked the first woman, "In what position was the baby conceived?" "He was on top ", she...

KID: Teacher can I go to the bathroom?TEACHER: You have to say your ABC's first.KID: Ok; a,b,c,d,e,f,g,h,i,j,k,l,m,n,o,q,r,s,t,u, v,w.x.y, and z.TEACHER: Where's the p?KID: It's...

"Hello?" Hearing only heavy breathing on the line, the woman repeated, "Hello?" "I'll bet you want me to come into your bedroom," a male voice whispered huskily, "...undress you,...

A girl told her boyfriend to take her shirt to the dry-cleaners. On his way, the boyfriend ripped her shirt. He came back, apologising for ripping her shirt. She said, "It's...

A nun and a priest were crossing the Sahara desert on a camel. On the third day out the camel suddenly dropped dead without warning.After dusting themselves off, the nun and the...