Marriage Jokes

Husband comes home drunk and breaks some plates, vomits and falls down on the floor! Wife pulls him up and cleans everything.Next day when he gets up he expects her to be really...

The government announced that if you have 5 children your salary will be increased by 50 percent. A man heard the news and said to his wife, "Darling, I have a kid with my...

Are you tired of the single life? Why not challenge God today? Buy the wedding gown and see if God won't supply the groom! If it doesn't work, RENT THE HALL!

A conversation between an husband and wife in their bedroom getting ready to have sex.HUSBAND: Dear, you should have this hair shaved a bit.WIFE: [Rolls her eyes] Yea! heard that...

A man brought a new computer home and asked his wife to set it up. The following day, when he got back from work he really needed to use the computer so he quickly put it on and...

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband came into the kitchen. "Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're...

A man comes back from work at night and heads straight to the bedroom to make love to his wife. He got into the blanket and they made a quick one. When he is done, he goes to the...

A married couple is driving along the highway doing a steady forty miles per hour. The wife is behind the wheel. Her husband abruptly looks across at her, speaking in a clear...

A man takes his seat at a world cup final. He looks to his left and notices that there is a spare seat between himself and the next guy.MAN: Who would ever miss the world cup...

A man married very pretty girl and after the wedding, laid down the following rules: "I'll be home when I want, if I want, and at what time I want - and I don't expect any hassle...