Marriage Jokes

A lady came to see her doctor and the following conversation ensued: LADY: Doctor please call in my husband. DOCTOR: Trust me, I am a gentleman.LADY: No doc, your nurse is sitting...

One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."I said...

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was...

After 15 years of marriage a wife asked her husband to describe her.He looked at her slowly and then said : "A-B-C-D-E-F-G- H-I-J-K"."What does that mean?" she asked."Adorable,...

Akpos' wife bought a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look years younger. After a long while sitting before the mirror applying the "miracle" products, she...

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband came into the kitchen. "Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're...

A married couple is driving along the highway doing a steady forty miles per hour. The wife is behind the wheel. Her husband abruptly looks across at her, speaking in a clear...

A man comes back from work at night and heads straight to the bedroom to make love to his wife. He got into the blanket and they made a quick one. When he is done, he goes to the...

A man takes his seat at a world cup final. He looks to his left and notices that there is a spare seat between himself and the next guy.MAN: Who would ever miss the world cup...

A man married very pretty girl and after the wedding, laid down the following rules: "I'll be home when I want, if I want, and at what time I want - and I don't expect any hassle...